Teething troubles once again!!

Who said teething troubles are over once your child is 3 yrs old !! My daughter is 6 now and is about to lose her first milk tooth.

She woke up one morning and complained of a toothache while brushing. I dreaded the thought of taking her to a dentist. To my relief, I noticed that a new tooth was coming and one of her front teeth was slightly moving. I told her stories of tooth fairies like most of the parents do, but she dint seem to be convinced. She spent quite some time in front of the mirror checking at various angles and she definitely wasn’t happy at the prospect of going to school with a missing tooth. Then I explained that it was natural for everyone to lose their teeth and get good ones. I gave her examples of her cousins who were toothless for quite some time before they had a new set of teeth.

I thought this was a passing phase and the concern is definitely more for the first tooth. Little did I realize that my troubles are far from over.

Three days passed and the tooth held on. She reduced her intake of solid foods. She had nightmares about swallowing her tooth while sleeping. She dreamt about tooth fairy putting in loads of coins under her pillow. She woke up every morning to check the progress. She brushes gingerly lest her tooth would come away with the brush.

Then lightening struck and she demanded more chocolates. I started to give her the usual lecture about getting bad teeth, etc. She gave me a know-it-all look and said, “It doesn’t matter, Mummy. I can ruin my old teeth. They will fall off soon and I will get a new set of white teeth. Then I can stop eating chocolates”.

I was speechless. I still wait for the day her tooth is out and we can go about our usual business.

Salute to Mothers

Mother’s Day is here again!! So what you may ask. As a mother, it feels good to be recognized for the mundane tasks that are part of my life. What is different about this year? The kind of focus women is getting.

Every year newspaper would be filled with interviews with celebrity moms and moms of celebrities. Of course there are those ads of special gifts vouchers and promotional offers. This year these are also present. But ordinary moms also got a special mention.

Special focus is on the moms who stood behind not-so-famous achievers like the daughter of a domestic help who topped 10^th standard board exams, or the mom and daughter duo who passed their SSLC together or the mother of a blind IAS topper. There is also open discussion on single, unwed mothers and some who are mothers of gays – topics which weren’t so openly discussed before. It is quite heartening to know that such women are coming forward to speak about their lives without hiding their identity.

Celebration of womanhood has become latest fad. But somehow it seems incomplete and on the surface without the support system of laws, regulations and government policies. It is good that at least two days a year are reserved for women – Women’s day and Mother’s day. But then other than special features in print and media what use are the celebrations?

Bills on women issues are left on the table at the parliament, archaic laws which were made years ago are yet to change, security issues of now increasing women work force are yet to be tackled, and scores of women caught in the crossfire of tradition and identity-crisis are yet to be liberalized. Life of a woman hasn’t changed much in decades. It has in fact worsened in some war torn countries.

I wish there were features about such courageous and suppressed women. Women who defied tradition and stood up for their values, women behind purdah bringing about a silent revolution, women who formed self-help groups to not only help themselves but also other underprivileged. I wish the focus is on less fortunate women who are not able to break the shackles that surround them and those who are struggling to let their voices be heard.

I congratulate the achievers. But my heart is with those who are silently fighting their own battles at home, with those whose undying spirit might not have given them freedom but paved the way for a brighter future for their children, with those who died in the crossfire various battles, with those whose voice has been suppressed. 

I salute the mothers of various victims who are fighting legal battles against all odds for the injustice done to their children. And my special wishes to the would-be mothers who have the ability to shape the future of their unborn children.

Ballot Wars

Just a month back, I was totally enthralled by the way political arena in India was shaping up. With campaigns like ‘Lead India’ spreading awareness, lot more young people were willing to exercise their voting rights this year. I have voted many times in the past. But thanks to the media attention this time, the political war turf is really hot. 

Disclaimer: Since this is a democratic country and I am entitled to discreteness when it comes to voting, I am not going to take any names here.

I was initially trying to choose between two parties whose ideologies I approved of. I thought that by voting for a party I can ensure that I back the winning horse. Then the ever vigilant media focused on the misdeeds of the candidates fielded by either parties and questioned the rationale behind their nomination. Then I thought I rather not stick to a party, but probably I should look at the candidates in the constituency that I am entitled to vote. Having gone through the party manifestos, I was further disillusioned about the ‘welfare’ that the party in power would bring to the people in state. When I looked at the candidates, I was more confused. I was not convinced that I want any of them to be my representative in the assembly and I was not totally convinced about their integrity.

Now what do I do? Though I wanted to vote, it has become a case of choosing among the lesser evils. 

Another thought crossed my mind - why should I vote at all? I no longer reside in my home state. It really doesn’t matter who represents my constituency since I am not affected personally. I do not have voting rights in the current location where I stay and hence I do not have a say in the governance that directly affects me. But my inner voice told me that it is my duty to vote, not a choice.

There are many interstate migrants like me. How can they exercise their voting rights? They have to take the trouble of going back to their home state or opt for postal ballet. Many have two voter ids – one for their home state and one for their recent address. 

I wish there was a system where I can influence through my vote in the locality I stay in rather than the locality that I am registered as a voter. Probably we can have a centralized unique social security number for all citizens so that one cannot cast vote twice. I can use my SSN to vote in the place I stay and thus benefit from my decision as a citizen. Possibility or a day dream? 

Well, I am back to watching ‘Ballot wars’ on television hoping to shortlist my candidate to vote for.