I got in touch with one of my friends who got laid off recently. He was sad to note that most of his ‘friends’ have disappeared from the face of the earth once they came to know about his situation (situational friends!!). I told him that this is the best time to separate the wheat from chaff among friends. It set me thinking on the subject of ‘friendship’.
Every one of us have ‘fair-weather-friends’ among our circle. Some of us are unfortunate enough to have more of such people around us. People are attracted towards your success and hover around you. It is very difficult to identify them when all things are rosy with you. At that time everyone is available to meet you and have some good time. When you are in trouble, some of them would be curious to know what happened. But beyond that they offer no solace.
Some of them might have looked at you for bailing them out of troubles. It is but natural that you assume that they will reciprocate the gesture when your time comes. But in realty those you help you in troubled times are your true well wishers (even though they don’t owe you anything).
There will be times when you look for someone who can just be your sound board. You feel the need to just talk out some issues, share your thoughts with and let the tension seep out of your system. Friends do come forward to lend their shoulder to cry on. But when it comes to giving you a hankie to blow your nose, there would be very few willing to do so. Hence it becomes prudent to watch out before spilling your troubles to someone, no matter how close he/she might be.
Quite a few people look for outsiders rather than turn to their partner. It could be that they do not want to unnecessarily burden their loved ones with their troubles. It could also be that they need someone to advise them impartially and their partner might be biased due to their love. It could also be that they might feel that their status in the eyes of the partner might reduce. There are umpteen issues with sharing with your partner. If you have an understanding partner then you are very lucky in life because you have someone available by your side to listen to you 24/7.
There are no guidelines to choose friends, are there? The subject itself is very subjective. One needs to go by gut feeling or by experience.
Probably just like marriage, friendship is also luck of the draw.
Every one of us have ‘fair-weather-friends’ among our circle. Some of us are unfortunate enough to have more of such people around us. People are attracted towards your success and hover around you. It is very difficult to identify them when all things are rosy with you. At that time everyone is available to meet you and have some good time. When you are in trouble, some of them would be curious to know what happened. But beyond that they offer no solace.
Some of them might have looked at you for bailing them out of troubles. It is but natural that you assume that they will reciprocate the gesture when your time comes. But in realty those you help you in troubled times are your true well wishers (even though they don’t owe you anything).
There will be times when you look for someone who can just be your sound board. You feel the need to just talk out some issues, share your thoughts with and let the tension seep out of your system. Friends do come forward to lend their shoulder to cry on. But when it comes to giving you a hankie to blow your nose, there would be very few willing to do so. Hence it becomes prudent to watch out before spilling your troubles to someone, no matter how close he/she might be.
Quite a few people look for outsiders rather than turn to their partner. It could be that they do not want to unnecessarily burden their loved ones with their troubles. It could also be that they need someone to advise them impartially and their partner might be biased due to their love. It could also be that they might feel that their status in the eyes of the partner might reduce. There are umpteen issues with sharing with your partner. If you have an understanding partner then you are very lucky in life because you have someone available by your side to listen to you 24/7.
There are no guidelines to choose friends, are there? The subject itself is very subjective. One needs to go by gut feeling or by experience.
Probably just like marriage, friendship is also luck of the draw.
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